Mayor Michael Bloomberg Would Have Your Pretty Little Head on a Stick, Sarah Palin!

Washington, DC - Even though a (likely type II diabetic) judge struck down NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg's ban on 32-ounce sugary sodas, that didn't stop America's self-proclaimed idiot sweetheart from gulping at CPAC.  Naturally, it's DIET Dr. Pepper so we have no fear of Sarah developing cankles.  Did you know bendy straws are in her contract?  Why isn't there a vocal coach in her contract? That's what I've been wondering since 2008.  That voice is like fingernails on a blackboard.  You betcha!  What does this mental defective possibly have to say at this point?  Oh yeah, "Lipstick, hockey, freedom, Jesus, Jesus, Momma Grizzlies, GUNS!" I was going to go to CPAC to cover it, but I polled my friends and nobody gave a shit.

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